Whatever Normal Is, I Don't Want It Anymore
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I woke up in the wee hours of the morning, my quiet time, my muse time.
Per usual, coffee was made, and I had a moment to just be in the stillness of a sleeping household.
We've been in here for days, weeks.
Yesterday, there was a mention of returning to normal.
It had me thinking, what in the world is that?
If it is rushing through life to meet some arbitrary timeline to make some arbitrary meaning out of racing past myself, it is not something I want to return to.
Life is an incredibly precious thing. Even more so if we stop and think that over 10,000 Americans from all walks of life have perished under Cover-19, and hundreds of thousands more are directly impacted either through recovering from it, losing employment from it, and upsetting what was their daily routine from it. Life is a precious precious thing, not to be wasted in scraping by trying to ekk out a living because some billionaire wants a gold toilet or some narcissist wants a pat on the back.
If that is normal, I don't want to return to the constant news reports of what the Dow is doing as an ode to this capitalist machine that constantly pits groups of people against each other with the "isms" being the underlying threads the knits it together.
There is an ancient passage that says you can't put new wine in old wineskins.
I've thought about that in these times when people have been forced to stop, literally, and not go out. Think deeply about what matters. Another pair of shoes? More gluttonous consumption? Shopping as entertainment? How in the world do these things matter?
Or is it that what people actually craved was the human connection, the ability to be in the world with someone else, to see and be seen?
Can there be a new normal when everyone has what they need?
No one hoarding because they have some capitalist greed mindset that they will get rich off selling toilet paper for $70 a roll or keeping it for themselves because the individualist mentality has them so bound up they can't consider that they are human together with everyone else.
I don't want a normal where children are not thriving in school because systems deem education a commodity to be consumed only to those in the right zip code. I want a new normal where their curiosity is met with possibility, regardless of where they are. What if they all had the access of the nation's best university libraries at their disposal and were allowed to learn at their own pace, not being penalized for not walking down a line like a robot? What if we were investing in their creative genius and not cogs in a wheel to follow a management schedule that is not meant for living. What if they were allowed to work in groups that did not prescribe to an arbitrary cut-off by age? What if they were all our children and we all invested in their bright horizons?
I want a new normal where the elders are revered for their wisdom and the gifts they have given us, not a continuation of generations attacking the ones who came before them for not being "woke" enough to meet their want-it-right-now demands. What if we actually sat at the feet of those who survived the impossible and have gained lessons on appreciating the gift of life?
I want a new normal where I can just be, where you can just be, just be and not have to put on a costume to go out into the world because the world may destroy your be-ing.
What was normal needs to not be anymore.
It needs to change and the earth has given us a warning sign. The time to do it is now.
Start all over and imagine again.
What was ever normal? What we had before was disfunction and overconsumption and exhaustion.
How about renewal and imagination and possibilities that are not measured in how many marbles one has amassed before they go home.
Perhaps I'm just dreaming.I'm the only one awake in my house, the morning chirping of the birds are my company and my mug from The Daily Press in Bed-Stuy is my comfort. Maybe there is a bit of longing in me as I journey through life and look forward to one day opening my doors again. I want to open them to a new world. Maybe it is the movie in my head that I imagine a place where the love if flowing.
What I do know is that whatever normal was before Covid-19, it can never be the same. So since it can't what about a new day, a brighter day, where we appreciated the gift of each other and never took for granted our next breath, the ability to be in company with loved ones, or simply a walk along the beach on a bright day.
Whatever normal was, I don't want it anymore.
I'm looking for a new being. Extraordinary, exuberant, excellent day. Beyond ordinary, beyond normal, reaching into exhilarating expectation.
I want possibilities.